What pisses you off? Part II: Electric Boogaloo

[David]

[stui magpie]

40kmh roadwork speedlimits when there's no fkn roadworks going on.

FFS, either pack the signs up when you knock off Friday or lay them down or something.

2km stretch short of Tallygaroopna, nothing happening, road is fine, not a worker or bit of machinery in sight, but it's 40kmh in a 100 zone.

Similar in stretches on the GV and Hume Freeways. You get in the habit of ignoring them then get a shock when one actually has people working and you have to slow down.

[eddiesmith]

Yep, we had one on the Calder for at least 6 months this year, was really annoying when you'd get stuck behind someone in the right lane doing 40...

But I had travelled on weekdays, weekends and nights over those 6 months and never saw any works taking place nor any evidence of works taking place, yet still the signs remained. Not sure if they're still there or not as there are some genuine roadworks zones all the way due to the potholes atm.

[roar]

[Skids]

Just the one flagpole David. Flying the Federation flag today

I guess I 'bother' roar because many of my ancestors fought and died, in multiple wars, under our flag. I love watching the flag fly in a solid breeze.
I sort of had some different stuff drilled into me when I was growing up. Dad was in the SAS and was very particular about things. I had to chop the wood and stack it in organised sizes in our wood shed, I had to keep each pile at the right level. The lawn had to be mowed length ways and then across. Our rubbish was funny, we had to pack it as small and tight as possible, always ending up not even half filling our bin by collection day. The beer bottle stack behind the wood shed was a work of art.
Planting our vegie patch, everything was perfectly spaced, I could go on and on.
My workmates have always given me heaps about how organised I hang my washing on the line.

[lazzadesilva]

[roar]

[stui magpie]

Fkn Councils.

I have a tree in my front yard, right next to the boundary, so it goes right over the footpath. Every spring I need to go out and trim it so it creates a tunnel for people walking through, generally cut it around 2m high. Over the years I've had compliments from people who stop under the tree for shade during summer or to shelter from rain.

Got a letter from the council, apparently it's obstructing people walking on the footpath and needs to be cut to a height of 2.5m. WTAF?

So I rang the council and spoke to the bloke who's name was on the letter. What a fkn bureaucratic twat. Everyone needs to follow the same rules, more people are out walking now and more are complaining, don't trim it back, fine of up to $2k. FMD. On my morning walk I often have to duck under branches overhanging footpaths and I'm 191cm. I can walk along the footpath in front of my house without an issue.

So looks like I'm doing some more pruning tomorrow, the fkn branches are going in the park next door, the council can deal with them

[eddiesmith]

$�$%^%%$ useless Councils are, the grass behind me is nearly as tall as me and they ain’t looking after it…

It could be Vic Roads as well but both are $�$%^%%$ useless!!! Being a busy road it’d only take one moronic smoker and my place is under very serious threat of fire…

The other thing that pisses me off is work, as it does everyone and I’m jealous of all your seachange and retirement talk, still a long way to go for me 😢😢

But no one else in my team can do my job, unlike my last work where there were 2-3 others who’d done it before me, everyone here who does it leaves in a year or 2, now I know why. The rest of the team has no clue about what I do and can’t help. Which means when I’m away from work it either doesn’t get done or they try and help and just **** it up completely.

Yet lucky for them I’m more than capable of doing their jobs, so when they feel under the pump as we are all the time now they love throwing their workload on to me. Like everyone were understaffed and the boss has made it worse by $�$%^%%$ up hiring decisions so it’s not a fun place to be.

Worst thing is she won’t even let me apply for short term secondments elsewhere because she can’t lose me, $�$%^%%$ bullshit. Still will probably apply anyway for ones I really want and would just have to give up ongoing employment to do it.

[David]

When your partner decides to post something on Facebook suggesting you’re slacking off on housework. Not only is it not true – I could do more, but so could she, and there are numerous tasks like vacuuming, taking rubbish out, cleaning the bathroom and mowing the lawn that she won’t do under any circumstances; on top of that, I work an average of 50+ hours compared to her 8–16 per week, and am more often than not solo parent on evenings and weekends when I’m not at my second job – but it’s a real lose-lose situation: you either post something in response and risk getting into a public argument, which is obviously really embarrassing and undignified, or you let it stand and let everyone assume that you are one of those guys who never lifts a finger (and that things must be particularly bad if she has no option but to post about it publicly).

How do you effectively communicate that this is not a great thing to do? Or am I making a mountain out of a molehill and just need to let it go?

(And yes, I see the irony in me posting this here. But at least this is somewhat anonymous…)

[stui magpie]

Did you try talking to her? Ask why she posted that?

She refuses to clean the bathroom or vacuum

[David]

Yeah, I think I'm a pretty patient partner all things considered.

As far as I can tell the main housework she does is stacking and unloading the dishwasher plus cleaning the kitchen (fair's fair, she probably does that more than I do) and doing the laundry, which I'd say we share 50/50. Otherwise, the rubbish isn't getting taken out unless I remember to do it, which is the story for a lot of stuff unfortunately.

Anyway, I asked and she said it wasn't about me, which I find kind of hard to believe tbh. Either way, I'm sure I wouldn't be the only one to jump to that conclusion, so it doesn't make me feel much better!

[lazzadesilva]

[stui magpie]

Free psycho analysis, I'd say the reason you feel bad about it is because you have a level of resentment that you're doing more than your fair share already, and the insinuation that you aren't doing so is insulting.

Suggestions (remember I'm divorced so relationship advice is not my strong suit) would be to DILLIGAF about what other people think. If anyone calls you out on FB, just respond with, "hey, the post wasn't about me, I do my share, isn't that right sweetheart?"

Then comes the real problem, and follow Lazza here, about having the conversation with your partner about extracting her arse from the armchair and actually doing something.

Stacking and unloading the dishwasher isn't housework, washing the dishes by hand is housework. Doing laundry? The only hard part about that is hanging the clothes on the line, bringing them in and putting them away, otherwise all you do is put clothes in the machine, add powder/liquid and turn it on.

Please tell me she at least does some of the cooking?

[think positive]

was the post her words or a meme?

either way there is usually some truth in it at least in the posters mind~
id go apeshit. i do. hubby doesnt post anything, he has facebook but doesnt really get social media. but he will slag me off in his so called jokes in public for a laugh, and i dont tolerate it anymore. and i dont care who thinks im a grumpy old witch!

stuis response is good. but id still say something.

on another note, $�$%^%%$ hell mate, i wish i got that much help, i literally do at least 80% of everything around the house, including repairs! and i have a hubby who leaves all his shoes near the front door, his socks in his work tray downstairs, and clothes from one end to the other, and he has a decent sized walk in robe, but bitches if there is 3 things on the kitchen bench when he comes home an hour early! my response? dont come home early, or are your arms painted on?


most of the time i dont mind because he works ridiculous hours, and so so hard, however, its his choice and he doesnt get to have a crack at me because hes tired and grumpy. and he can blame menopause or anything else, i really dont give a ****. its actually me finally standing up for myself and i do it all day long now! liberating. i went to the farm at 7am, cleaned out the chook shed, refilled the food, cleaned out their water and the sheeps water, checked ginnies leg, and gave him a big cuddle and scratch, hes a big teaddy bear sheep! gave the other a bit when he got jealous and they started headbutting each other!! then spent 2 hours in the rain/heat/rain cutting all the perimieter grass, the chooks free space yard, which is a good house block size full of fricken rabbit holes, around the sheeps water trough area, and then a path inside the fence of the three paddocks. did a little gardening, got the internet working, drove an hour home, stopped for a little chrismas shopping, showered, made from scratch snitzels, cooked them with 3 veg, did most of the dishes, checked my emails, helped pull the fridge ice maker apart, and put it back together, did urgent paperwork but said no to anymore! so im hardly lazy!im about to veg with my knitting and The Cleaning lady, i highly recommend this show, brilliant!