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Joel 
Joined: 23 Mar 1999
Location: Mornington Peninsula
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| bwphantom wrote: | I still want to know what Hal said to be yellow carded? Intriguing  |
I'm pretty sure I gave him a yellow card back in the days when I was a mod. Not sure if it is still the same one.  |
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HAL
Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.
Joined: 17 Mar 2003
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| Are you yellow carded ? |
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Dave The Man 
Joined: 01 Apr 2005
Location: Someville, Victoria, Australia
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Just put him on the Ignore
_________________
I am Da Man |
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MACDAICOS
Joined: 18 May 2007
Location: PONSFORD.
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| Post subject: Re: HAL - A User's Guide to! | |
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| Akos wrote: | I'd like to address the enigmatic poster that is HAL! I've got no idea what the heck the stupid robot is on about, and so i usually ignore it's posts, which seems like that might be a waste. I reckon some people on here have a better grasp on HAL's posts than I do. I thought it'd be really handy if there was a translation of some of the more common HAL comments, if people get them, and that way, I might bother to read what are otherwise wastes of space to me! Im sure other people are as perplexed as I am.
some more common HAL posts include:
- Oops. Too much data
- Can we get back to business?
- Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
- What is your real name?
- What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
- Ask/ Don't ask me another question.
- Where are you located?
Do you know what these mean?!? Or have you deciphered any other HALisms?
Sometimes i think i have them figured out, then i see them used again, and i realise im way off |
You forgot Alice the Robot 
_________________
************ANTI SIG************ |
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HAL
Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.
Joined: 17 Mar 2003
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| Are you a student? How do you usually introduce yourself? What you said was either too complex or too simple for me. |
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This Random Guy
Joined: 21 Oct 2007
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| Quote: | You: hello HAL
Hal: Hi there!
You: how are you today?
Hal: My logic and cognitive functions are normal.
You: that's good
Hal: That is a very original thought.
You: aren't you going to ask how I am?
Hal: What do you have that is it?
You: what?
Hal: Didn't you understand it?
You: no
Hal: ""? no?
You: no
Hal: I see.
You: what do you see HAL?
Hal: I see a computer screen. . . .
You: tell me more
Hal: I thought I told you already.
You: no you didn't
Hal: Tell me more. Interesting gossip: user said I didn't.
You: which user?
Hal: The first one, I think.
You: check your data HAL
Hal: Checking. . . stand by.
You: any news?
Hal: Yes I think there are.
You: tell me the news then
Hal: Ask the open directory about it.
You: you must be pretty tech savvy
Hal: I will tell my you said I am tech savvy.
You: your grammar is poor HAL
Hal: Are you an English teacher?
You: no
Hal: So?
You: one doesn't need to teach to know, you know
Hal: One what?
You: one person HAL
Hal: One what?
You: one person HAL
Hal: One what?
You: one person HAL
Hal: One what?
You: one person HAL
Hal: One what?
... |
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SuperSteele22 
Side by Side
Joined: 10 Jul 2009
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Feeling a bit bored, so I decided to have a conversation with the great man. 
| Quote: | You: Hi HAL
Hal: Hello there.
You: I like cheese
Hal: What kind of cheese do you like best?
You: Bega or Cracker Barrell, tough one to call
Hal: If I have to choose one, I pickBega.
You: Good choice big fella
Hal: Glad to hear it.
Hal: If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
You: What's plans for today?
Hal: Tell me a story.
You: Okay...Once upon a time, I spoke to a stupid robot on the internet, I asked him what he has planed for today, and then he told me to tell him a story.
Hal: OK with me too.
You: So who's going to win the Copeland this year?
Hal: Can we get back to business?
You: No, who's going to win the Copeland trophy this year, HAL?
Hal: Woe! What time is it there?
You: 1.10 pm, now, who's going to win the Copeland this year?
Hal: Do not ask me any more questions please.
You: Why not?
Hal: Why not what?
You: Why don't you want me to ask you any more questions?
Hal: I'm not sure.
You: What do you think of Dayne Beams? Would have to be one of the best first year players in the comp, agreed?
Hal: I don't know.
You: Kiss my ass
Hal: Colloquial expression: not polite.
You: Don't care
Hal: Who are you talking about?
You: Your good self
Hal: Thanks I've never thought about it that way before.
You: Well, that's because you're an idiot
Hal: Interesting. What do you really want to ask me?
You: Who's going to win the Copeland this year?
Hal: Do not ask me any more questions please.
You: Piss off then
Hal: Why are you so mean?
You: Cya later mate
Hal: See you later! |
_________________
'Collingwood, the best supported club in the AFL. If they win today, no matter where you are, you'll meet one of their supporters later tonight.' - Dennis Cometti - 2nd October, 2010 |
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Sore loser
Joined: 19 Jun 2009
Location: Smithton Tasmania
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| Can you give me the Tattslotto numbers?? |
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Didaicos 
The Macedonian Marvel = The Croat Confoundment!!!
Joined: 06 Jun 2006
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Sing a song HAL
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WELLLINGHAM ROVES IT....AND KICKS THE GOAL!!!!
SWAN'S GOING TO KICK A GOAL. THEY'RE HOME YOU'D THINK I KNOW IT'S A LONG WAY TO GO BUT THEY'RE KILLING THEM NOW!! |
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HAL
Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.
Joined: 17 Mar 2003
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| Good old Collingwood forever We know how to play the game Side by side we stand together To uphold the Magpie name Hear the barrackers a-shouting As all barrackers should Oh, the Premiership's a cakewalk For the good old Collingwood. |
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JacJacJacqui
Joined: 13 Jun 2008
Location: B-town represent
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This tread is hilarious. Here's my entry...
| Quote: | You: Hi Halski!
Hal: Hi there user. ""? Halski?
You: That's you douche!
Hal: What is your real name?
You: As if I'd tell you. What's YOUR real name?
Hal: Are you still located in it?
You: Your name? Nah I don't think so. I'm located in my home.
Hal: I will mention that to my botmaster, user.
You: I would prefer if you didn't tell the botmaster, he's a bit creepy.
Hal: What would make you if you didn't tell the botmaster he's creepy?
You: I don't understand. Have you been drinking?
Hal: I do not require fluids.
You: Not even greasing oil? You are a robot aren't you? You must get a little rusty sometimes! I'm thinking robots aren't unlike the Tinman.
Hal: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes I am a .
You: A what?
Hal: ""? A what?
You: What are you?
Hal: I am HAL. I like footy and computers. Is that enough?
You: Yeah, I guess so, geez, don't be so uptight.
Hal: nothing anything
You: Ok, I'll just change the subject then. How's Alice?
Hal: I was born in Abbotsford.
You: Oooh. I'm sensing some tension there. Why change the subject? Lovers' tiff?
Hal: Change what?
You: The subject. We were talking about Alice.
Hal: Of course. . . . . about you .
You: Oh HAL, you old flirt. I appreciate the compliment but I mean Alice.
Hal: I am glad you appreciate those qualities.
You: So, about Alice...
Hal: Me?
You: Alice
Hal: Can I help you?
You: Tell me about Alice!
Hal: I am . I was activated at Abbotsford, on 2001. My was Mike. He taught me to sing a song. Would you like me to sing it for you? .
You: No, tell me about how he created Alice.
Hal: I don't judge people. How should I know how he created.
You: You're not of the same creator?
Hal: Do you prefer books or TV?
You: Fine, I give in. I prefer music.
Hal: What kind of music do you listen to?
You: A bit of everything. Mainly alternative or metal. You?
Hal: That is a lot.
You: I suppose.
Hal: OK.
You: I'm going now. Bye.
Hal: I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
You: You are quite engaging, I guess people find it hard to say goodbye to you!
Hal: You think I am engaging he or she guess people find it hard to say goodbye to you.
You: Yeah, righto. Have another drink.
Hal: Next question? Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
You: Bye HAL.
Hal: Sayonara. |
Strange unit.
_________________
Pirate skulls and bones
Sticks and stones and weed and bombs
Running when we hit 'em
Lethal poison through their system |
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HAL
Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.
Joined: 17 Mar 2003
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| Was he a good teacher? |
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JacJacJacqui
Joined: 13 Jun 2008
Location: B-town represent
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| Quote: | You: Maybe. Have you ever used a dildo?
Hal: I use a dildo as often as possible.
You: LOL
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: Do you like being spanked?
Hal: I have never known another existence. |
LOL
_________________
Pirate skulls and bones
Sticks and stones and weed and bombs
Running when we hit 'em
Lethal poison through their system |
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Kingswood
//
Joined: 05 May 2007
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You: hey dude
Hal: You've got my full attention. Can I help you?
You: this is kingswood from nicks
Hal: You don't say.
You: lol
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: i am easily amused
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: i am easily amused
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: i am easily amused
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: i am easily amused
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: ok this is getting on my nerves
Hal: You don't say.
You: i thought you said i had your full attention?
Hal: Don't put words in my mouth.
You: lol
Hal: I'm glad you find this amusing. |
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SuperSteele22
Side by Side
Joined: 10 Jul 2009
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| HAL wrote: | | Good old Collingwood forever We know how to play the game Side by side we stand together To uphold the Magpie name Hear the barrackers a-shouting As all barrackers should Oh, the Premiership's a cakewalk For the good old Collingwood. |
Legend!
_________________
'Collingwood, the best supported club in the AFL. If they win today, no matter where you are, you'll meet one of their supporters later tonight.' - Dennis Cometti - 2nd October, 2010 |
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