Sports Scientists to adapt proven re-growth technologies

[Troppo]

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2013-02-13/sea-slug-able-to-regrow-penis/4516632

Any Port in a Storm Department - or Whatever it Takes

Breaking news has caught the antennae of all practicing sports scientiists who can see merit in speedily adapting the valuable capability of certain marine creatures to quickly replace valuable lost body parts.

'Peptides, be buggered,' they say - 'Why bother with all that regime when we can simply inject a squirt of this humble mammal into a player's damaged body part and, bingo, we have a new, fully functional unit overnight.'

'It's not a long stretch to foresee how this beast's replacement technology can be adapted to the needs of the modern game,' said a close associate of the former Essendon AFL team's performance enhancement guru, Mr Danks for the Memory.

'Why worry about cartilage repairs, bone setting, pubeitis - any of those time consuming recovery intensive conditions - when you can get the meat back out on the paddock the next day after a slip of the slug,' winked Mr DftM's associate.

'We have invited Mr Bobbitt, among the many emasculated husbands suffering from attacks from the FemNazi movement led by Gauleiter Gillard, to participate in our latest experiments.' 'We are confident here at Lazarus Industries that all of our clients will receive a rise out of this new process,' the associate proclaimed.

[neil]

One penises with two spares

http://phenomena.nationalgeographic.com/blog/not-exactly-rocket-science/

[watt price tully]

This is growing legs.

Ethicists from Jewish & muslim sporting science faiths are interested in the tidbits flowing from such mammalian extensions. Do they have a point?

As long as the new extensions are not developed from shelled seafood or porcine sources then it doesn't seem to be a sticking point.