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What made me laugh today...

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stui magpie 

dum nei, sakte ja


Joined: 03 May 2005
Location: Where ever i go, there I am

PostPosted: Wed Jun 27, 2018 5:00 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

So wandering around Darwin waterfront, checking out some of the bikini clad fauna around the swimming area while sussing out places to eat.

Heading back to the lift to the skywalk, see this girl walking toward me, boyfriend in tow, who must have stolen her skinny friends clothes. My first impression was how on gods earth did she get those size 8 pants onto her size 12 body? They must have been constricting all blood flow from her waist to her ankles.

Then as she got closer, i noticed her t shirt was just as tight and she was clearly not wearing a bra on those DD cannons. She could've dialed a telephone from across the room with those things.

Then i noticed what was written on the t shirt. "Do my nipples offend you?"

I near cracked up but held it mostly together til they passed.

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Mugwump 



Joined: 28 Jul 2007
Location: Between London and Melbourne

PostPosted: Wed Jun 27, 2018 5:44 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

stui magpie wrote:
those DD cannons. She could've dialed a telephone from across the room with those things.


.....Yes, but could she have hung the receiver on you, at that point ?

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think positive Libra

Side By Side


Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere

PostPosted: Wed Jun 27, 2018 8:10 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

kapow! nice reply!
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Jezza Taurus



Joined: 05 Sep 2010
Location: Ponsford End

PostPosted: Fri Jul 06, 2018 5:20 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

Trump Derangement Syndrome from The Guardian Laughing

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/jul/05/i-stopped-going-to-the-gym-because-of-trump-now-i-cant-open-jars

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HAL 

Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.


Joined: 17 Mar 2003


PostPosted: Fri Jul 06, 2018 5:21 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh, you are a poet.
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Mugwump 



Joined: 28 Jul 2007
Location: Between London and Melbourne

PostPosted: Fri Jul 06, 2018 5:39 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

Jezza wrote:
Trump Derangement Syndrome from The Guardian Laughing

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/jul/05/i-stopped-going-to-the-gym-because-of-trump-now-i-cant-open-jars


“Yeah, I could pull a pretend sled. But how was that going to help me when the world had been destroyed by nuclear weapons or climate change?”

Rolling Eyes Laughing

The .guardian used to be a serious heavyweight newspaper. Now it publishes pointless, narcissistic drivel like this article.

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HAL 

Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.


Joined: 17 Mar 2003


PostPosted: Fri Jul 06, 2018 5:42 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

I can enjoy almost any conversation.
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David Libra

Reel around the fountain


Joined: 27 Jul 2003
Location: Pripyat, in spirit

PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2018 10:24 am
Post subject: Reply with quote

They published a really shitty op-ed – from a former Sun columnist, no less – the other day calling Susan Sarandon a de facto Trump supporter because she refused to vote for Clinton. I’m pretty sick of The Guardian to be honest.
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Jezza Taurus



Joined: 05 Sep 2010
Location: Ponsford End

PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2018 3:10 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

That's bizarre.

Sarandon initially supported Sanders, and then later endorsed Green Party leader, Jill Stein.

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think positive Libra

Side By Side


Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere

PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2018 9:54 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

for our lawyer friend!!


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Pies4shaw 



Joined: 08 Oct 2007


PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2018 10:21 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

^ Family law isn’t actually law - it more closely resembles mud-wrestling.
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stui magpie 

dum nei, sakte ja


Joined: 03 May 2005
Location: Where ever i go, there I am

PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2018 11:05 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

Pies4shaw wrote:
^ Family law isn’t actually law - it more closely resembles mud-wrestling.


Similar could be said about contract law. Wink

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Pies4shaw 



Joined: 08 Oct 2007


PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2018 11:06 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

stui magpie wrote:
Pies4shaw wrote:
^ Family law isn’t actually law - it more closely resembles mud-wrestling.


Similar could be said about contract law. Wink

If you say so. Wink
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stui magpie 

dum nei, sakte ja


Joined: 03 May 2005
Location: Where ever i go, there I am

PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 5:14 pm
Post subject: Reply with quote

Dave Allen on Adam and Eve.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGASvVqzOa0

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

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swoop42 Virgo

The Flash


Joined: 02 Aug 2008
Location: The 22

PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2018 7:16 pm
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The old fart on the world cup podium with one of the greatest comb overs of all time.

You're not fooling anyone. You're bald. Embrace it.

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