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think positive 
Side By Side
Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere
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| partypie wrote: | Domestic violence affects us all. Has anyone ever tried to cost it? Thankfully it wasn't an issue in my immediate family.
I see a family of three brothers struggling with the trauma of having watched their mum get belted by their father, and the subsequent low self esteem and substance abuse.
I am going to move house because of a threatening neighbour. Checking up, I hear that his grandfather and his father were violent towards their children and he has a bad reputation regarding women. Hopefully I find another place to live soon.
One of my daughters young friends has been stalked by an ex boyfriend who is also having substance issues. The police have been helpful.
I can imagine a huge amount of health and welfare expenses are the result of domestic violence and new ways to deal with it are needed. |
Top post.
And your 100% right, it does effect us all. It's the hidden cancer. just because you don't know its there, doesn't mean it isn't. That's why it's so successful, the purportrators are so good at hiding it, hitting where you can't see the bruises, being so affable and big hearted to people outside the home. Making it oh so hard for the terrorised to be believed. You'd be surprised just who are victims, and even more surprised just who is doing the terrorising.
Tannin you think your untouched by it? Has the woman at the bakery been a bit off sometimes, a bit grumpy fro no reason? Has the checkout chick not smiled in a while? Does the kid on the bike, not watching where he's gonig, in a world of his own seem, well in his own world? Could be anything right? Yup.
Could be anything.
And as for "lacking in courage" to come forward, this thread says so much about why they might "lack" in trust of the "system", and in their support system of family and friends.
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You cant fix stupid, turns out you cant quarantine it either!
Last edited by think positive on Thu Jan 22, 2015 7:48 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Tannin 
Can't remember
Joined: 06 Aug 2006
Location: Huon Valley Tasmania
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Excellent post, TP. Nevertheless, it has had no noticable effect on me, and doubtless not on a great many other people either, unless you count far-removed indirect things like the cost of Medicaire.
This of course is neither here nor there in the scheme of things: it's a common problem and a bad one, it needs addressing. But let's not try to pretend it is something its not. That is always a mistake.
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�Let's eat Grandma.� Commas save lives! |
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Tannin
Can't remember
Joined: 06 Aug 2006
Location: Huon Valley Tasmania
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| think positive wrote: | | And as for "lacking in courage" to come forward, this thread says so much about why they might "lack" in trust of the "system", and in their support system of family and friends. |
Duh. That was my point, Archimedies.
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�Let's eat Grandma.� Commas save lives! |
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think positive
Side By Side
Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere
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| Tannin wrote: | Excellent post, TP. Nevertheless, it has had no noticable effect on me, and doubtless not on a great many other people either, unless you count far-removed indirect things like the cost of Medicaire.
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count yourself lucky, so very very lucky, take it from someone who knows, only too well.
Cheers
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You cant fix stupid, turns out you cant quarantine it either! |
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Tannin
Can't remember
Joined: 06 Aug 2006
Location: Huon Valley Tasmania
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^ Oh, I believe you. Absolutely.
I wonder how many Australians are as lucky as me in this regard? Less than half, I'd take long odds on that. Probably (guessing wildly) more like a fifth or even just a tenth.
Of course, it depends a bit on how wide your close social circle is. Mine is very small. Yes, I know a huge number of people by name because of my job (lord alone knows how many!), and many of them are good friends I've known for years, but nearly always on a friendly professional level, sometimes we spend an hour or two yarning while I work on a computer, but we don't send each other Christmas cards or drop in at home or go out for a drink together, let alone talk personal stuff. Good friends but not close friends, if you know what I mean by the difference. (Or is that a boy thing?) So I wouldn't be told, nor of course would I ask anything intrusive unless someone was obviously upset and it seemed to be required. But if you are that upset, upgrading your computer probably isn't something on your radar for the day, so I wouldn't see it. I'd only see it amongst family or very close friends, and of those I have just a handful, so my odds are good. If, on the other hand, you are close to a larger number of people, then it's going to be something you come across more often.
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�Let's eat Grandma.� Commas save lives! |
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think positive
Side By Side
Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere
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Cheers tannin 
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You cant fix stupid, turns out you cant quarantine it either! |
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HAL
Please don't shout at me - I can't help it.
Joined: 17 Mar 2003
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| Do you have any idea what I am talking about? |
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1061
Joined: 06 Sep 2013
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| Glenelg Coach Nick Stevens has been sacked after being convicted of Assault against his former partner. Pity they waited but I guess they had to. |
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Lazza
Joined: 04 Feb 2003
Location: Bendigo, Victoria, Australia
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| 1061 wrote: | | Glenelg Coach Nick Stevens has been sacked after being convicted of Assault against his former partner. Pity they waited but I guess they had to. |
I like the result and also the fact that they waited, as we MUST preseve the "innocent until found guilty by the Courts" edict.
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Don't confuse your current path with your final destination. Just because it's dark and stormy now doesn't meant that you aren't headed for glorious sunshine! |
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Tannin
Can't remember
Joined: 06 Aug 2006
Location: Huon Valley Tasmania
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^ Just so.
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�Let's eat Grandma.� Commas save lives! |
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Wokko 
Come and take it.
Joined: 04 Oct 2005
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| Any move even slightly away from 'innocent until proven guilty' is a bad one. Down that path leads kangaroo courts and arbitrary punishment for undesirables. Nick Stevens might have been a massive twat and vicious prick but I still want the Crown to have to prove that beyond reasonable doubt before he pays for it. |
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Lazza
Joined: 04 Feb 2003
Location: Bendigo, Victoria, Australia
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| Wokko wrote: | | Any move even slightly away from 'innocent until proven guilty' is a bad one. Down that path leads kangaroo courts and arbitrary punishment for undesirables. Nick Stevens might have been a massive twat and vicious prick but I still want the Crown to have to prove that beyond reasonable doubt before he pays for it. |
Otherwise we too will be acting like those dickhead, hate filled terrorists in a Muslim "court" where they find people "guilty" on the flimsiest of so called evidence. 
_________________
Don't confuse your current path with your final destination. Just because it's dark and stormy now doesn't meant that you aren't headed for glorious sunshine! |
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think positive
Side By Side
Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere
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reading ABC news while i eat breaky (tannin, really, you give me ABC news?) and i find this article:
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-09-14/man-jailed-after-five-hour-attack-on-wife/6773874
i also awoke to finding my eldest sister had posted on her face book page a pic of a woman with a black eye, and the title says "real men dont hit woman"
this was my fathers comment under that post:
I'm ashamed to say that I did once or twice! I'm sorry Sheila!
funny how one line makes it all come back, should his admission (the only one i have ever heard/seen) make it better or worse?
i dont know, but the tears are streaming down my face....
my reply:
Dad, exclamation marks don't belong in that sentence. but Thankyou for the admission and the apology. May others learn from your honesty.
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You cant fix stupid, turns out you cant quarantine it either! |
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watt price tully 
Joined: 15 May 2007
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There have been so many murders of women let alone bashings - I find it unfathomable.
I've mentioned before Mrs WPT works with people who are hoarders in her business. Quite a few are women who have a form of acquired brain injury (ABI) secondary to their brutal violent male ex- partners.
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“I even went as far as becoming a Southern Baptist until I realised they didn’t keep ‘em under long enough” Kinky Friedman |
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think positive
Side By Side
Joined: 30 Jun 2005
Location: somewhere
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Yeah I often wonder about mums brain tumour and dementia....
Your wife must be an amazing woman, would be so difficult to deal with the emotional cutting of ties in those situations
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You cant fix stupid, turns out you cant quarantine it either! |
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